Re: I had sex at 11

There are some people, Brudda, that would consider you lucky for finding an older man that wanted to be sexual with you when you were 11. Our community also includes gerontophiles and AAM's (Adult Attracted Minors), who are (generally) young people who have a sexual, emotional, social and spiritual preference for significantly older people. Judging from your story, it doesn't seem that you actually had a preference for adults, but you simply happened to meet an adult that you were attracted to. All of these things are possible.

I'm sorry that it was a let-down, and that you wish you had waited. However, not everyone who is sexually active feels as you do. I think sexual activity is DIFFERENT for everyone, because all of us have unique expectations and desires. As for having to "grow up" faster after this...did you try to act "older" in order to please your boyfriend? Are you aware that GLer's generally love girls EXACTLY as they are, and do not want or expect them to "grow up" or act older? Many young people yearn for being older, and many older people yearn to be younger. That is just natural.

Although you wished you had waited, I do think you learned valuable lessons from your early sexual experiences. I don't think there is anything wrong with promiscuity, as long as you practice safe sex. Do you feel bad about this simply because society judges it as being "slutty"? I think a lot of reasons you felt it was a let-down is because you met the WRONG man and also because our cultural attitudes made you feel guilty about "not being a kid." Is there any reason that kids can't enjoy sexual experiences and still be "kids" as our society defines that term. I think it's wrong to base a female's moral fortitude on how much she abstains from sexual activity. You didn't become a bad person and you didn't end up "fucked up for life" as a result of your early experiences.

I didn't start having sex until I was 18, and I really really wish I had my sexual experiences EARLIER in life. I really wasn't prepared for my first love affair when I was 18, and I was used very badly, because the girl in question wasn't in love with me, she just wanted to have a good time. She was a wild college chick and I was a lovestruck boy who had little prior experience. I had made out when I was younger, but I really wish I had more intimate relations prior to turning 18. At least your boyfriend stayed with you a while. So not all of us are glad that we waited. Some of us didn't wait by choice. I think your early sexual experiences taught you MUCH about life, and now you are all the more better prepared to deal with life as a result of it. So I don't think it was a totally regretable experience.

Some girls may indeed regret being sexual early in life, but that doesn't mean their life is ruined. It should be pointed out that some of us regret waiting.

I think if a young girl meets the right man, she can learn much about life and find it a very exhilarating experience.