I forgot to mention

that we have something in common. That being - I too tend to hang with / date, young (legal age) girls. And I too, feel not so wonderful inside when I am out with said girl, and notice the young lovelies. I have no expectations or desire to be with them, and therfore this dulls the pain. But it easy as hell to torment ones self. I just choose not to do this. I am a spectator of this life and enjoy the company of youth as it arises. I am satisfied with whatever the situation offers. I keep my desire to affect the course of the situation, to a dull roar. I am happy if I only am able to watch, and am happy if I have opportunity to interact (like I did with my friends 12 y.o. the other week - when we had a little wrestling match - she was trying to get my head cover. i just enjoy the moments for what they are. Anticipation kills. So I just don't fuckign anticipate or expect or try and control. Once again - Hope This was a help.