Sorry to hear that...

for both of you. I know depression is something Lindsay has written about dealing with before. I feel regret about the way things are from time to time as well, though I seem to have been able to avoid the kind of depression Lindsay has experienced. Perhaps it's because I'm still fairly young and at least feel that there is a fair amount of time for things to change somewhat in my lifetime, even if the evidence that they will is somewhat lacking.

I wonder if Lindsay was ultimately happier when he was public as an activist? I know he's had struggles, both when he was out and when he ceased activism, but at least he had something bigger to fight for when he was out. I don't pretend to understand what he's dealt with, but he seemed to show some vitality for a while when he was on the activist scene and seemed to relish going after his detractors in particular (sort of a happy warrior, I guess). I still wonder from time to time if there are events surrounding his disappearance from the scene that we don't know about that might have influenced his decision. God knows those PJ thugs hunted him like a dog.

At any rate, I know his work influenced quite a number of people, and I believe those who were inspired by what he did will eventually help accomplish good things for us. He spoke in one of his interviews about "planting a seed" within people, and I really think we'll see something come to pass as a result of his work one day. I'm certainly glad I discovered these online communities--and discovered myself--when he was on the scene. And despite what he may think, I know his attempts resulted in some positive things.

At any rate, I won't be so presumptuous to act as if I understand your situation better than you and can offer some advice that might be relevant to you, Griffith. So I'll just say that I hope you find peace and that you can at least take some comfort in knowing that there are people here who can empathise and who wish you well.