Helping people recover from trauma

"I remember watching a video on child sex abuse in a child psych class. The therapists would often try to keep the child from talking about the abuse. The rational is that the child will become re-victimized by the memories."

Oddly enough, there is a whole school of psychologists who treat people who underwent trauma by pushing them to describe the traumatic events over and over and over again until those traumatic events have lost their power. Patients who undergo this therapy typically have worse outcomes than individuals who get no therapy at all.

Of course, I have my own ideas about how to help victims of abuse or trauma. Ask them what they need, and if you can give it to them, do that. If they need information, give it to them. If you don't have the information, try to help them look for it. If they are comfortable with it, give them a hug. If you can help them get in touch with friends or family, do that too. Friends and family are more important to the average person's well-being than their psychologist.

Most important of all, don't push your own beliefs on them - especially your beliefs about how harmful or harmless a given experience was. If the experience was common or normal, that might be worth saying so they understand that such experiences are common or normal, but don't presume to dictate how they should feel about it.

Let them know that you are there for them.