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I actually toyed with the idea of killing myself.

Posted by AK47 on 2012-January-08 07:35:52 EST, Sunday
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The best part is that it wasn't for "depressive" reasons. Today was so good, so amazing, so much fun that I thought, "Maybe I should just end it now on a high note."

It is funny... thinking about killing myself because I was so happy. I have a strong feeling that my life will not always be this happy and great. I read about paedos and them being alone, not with little girls, knowing only pictures of girls. Never feeling that love, that touch, that trust, that happiness.

I have so much contact with a diverse group of little girls. I'd go insane if I lost this. I have gotten too used to being with little girls.

Not only this but being with little girls calms my sexual side. I just spent the day with Q. So much love. I don't even feel like masturbating now. Now take the opposite scenario. Me not being around little girls. I start looking at them so sexually. I don't get it.

So when I am not with little girls I get incredibly sexually frustrated and I feel like there is a part of me missing, life isn't complete. I hate being so dependent on something I fucking hate it, but it is what it is.


Of course I won't be killing myself. I'd never ever ever ever ever do that to the little girls in my life. Not only this but I'd never do that to my family or friends.

Regardless of what antis think I am loved and needed.

I am awesome.

My life IS the Legend of Awesomeness........sweet!

AK47

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