Re: adoption issues

I understand that having a child outside of ones own race is daunting but I don't think it's as big a deal as people make it out to be. The main problem is that white people don't realize how much racism there is and all that. It's actually probably harder for people who adopt outside their race to have to deal with other peoples ridiculous comments. I don't know if someone should seek out a poor match, it's totally practical to understand your limits, and if you know adopting a child outside your race is something you aren't willing to do than it's better off that you don't. I just don't think it's as much a big deal as most people do. I also believe you could do just as much good to a white child as a black child. I mean really a black child is, probably, going to end up in a foster home with white caregivers. Sometimes they don't but they probably would.

If you did have a black child I think it would be important to maybe live in a more multi-cultural area (as to a all-white area) where they aren't, you know, the only white kid in their grade (I've been to a school where you could count how many black kids were in my grade on one hand). And probably have like a black friend or something. The main thing they'd have to deal with is prejudice or racism but otherwise I don't think they're so totally different that you can't ever possibly connect. Also behaviors can be unlearned and new behaviors can be taught. Not to mention I don't see how a black child could learn behaviors that are against your priorities that white child wouldn't.

You can still adopt if you're a single male, and really you'd probably be able to get an older child a LOT easier than an infant or toddler. And most people don't adopt sibling groups so you'd probably be even more able to. I don't know if adopting a sibling group so you can give the older child responsibility to watch the younger ones is the best idea but it might work in certain situations. There are times when an older sibling will be very intent on being seen as the parent since they sometimes were the main caretakers (especially girls) and that might actually work out (if they can do it without having to be aggressive).

People should be more open to adopting older kids, I know everyone wants the babies or infants but an older child can bring so much to a family. Some of them might have issues but if people can go into that type of situation with their eyes open and know what their limits are it can totally work out.