Re: Am I destroying my life with drugs + alcohol?

Ok, good observation, mate.

But does this mean you believe drugs and alcohol are morally wrong?

I wouldn't really disagree with you, if you thought so. It's just in my situation, I live in an extremely corrupt cesspool, surrounded by vipers hissing their tongues at me, and it just so happens alcohol and the drug/s I take are freely available for me, legally. I guess I just choose a lesser evil.

There is a certain way of life I wish to live... one which could be made very easily, and its very doable. A way of life of love, peace, harmony, friendship, etc. If I had that way of life, I would quit all this drinking and etc immediately. And yep, I would be able to.

I'm just at a loss on how to spend my time, and how to feel good. Getting drunk eases me and makes me feel content, and it eases my mind. I can't spend my whole day overwhelmed by the state of my life, how to change it, and thinking about the state of the world. I need to escape that. I guess I'm in some kind of paranoid shell-shock where I can't stop thinking about these things.

I've tried going to shrinks, but their drugs just make me feel incredibly drowsy and sleepy. No matter what they put me on, I need to sleep. Even for a low dose. Such drugs can make me sleep for around a day.