Dear Abby Places The Blame On The Wrong Party

"Woman Who Was Abused As A Child Needs Therapy"

How awful. I presume that the therapy would be in order to recover from the reprehensible effects of what her abuser perpetrated upon her. Right?

"Dear Abby: I have been in a relationship with the man of my dreams for five years. Everything is great between us except one huge thing: We are no longer intimate.

..... I suspect that it might be linked to molestation I suffered as a child. At that time, I was told, People who love you dont touch you like that. Logically, I know that this is different, but my partner tells me I just freeze up when we are together."

Whoa?! Her inability to be intimate is the result of those who chose to tell her afterwards that love can't be expressed sexually. Nowhere does she mention the acts or words of the "molester" in the negative. Only those of the folks who told her that the sex she'd had couldn't be related to love then and ( by extension ) now.

Does "Dear Abby" tell her that whoever acted as a therapist at the time killed her ability to enjoy sex?

....

"Please accept my sympathy. Considering your history, what youre experiencing is understandable, and yes, you need to talk to a therapist. The therapy should have started at the time you were molested. "

Erm, "Abby," it did. And its the therapy which f*cked her over. I seriously doubt that any new intervention will seek to undue the damage by telling her how wrong her previous "help" was.

Anyone who interferes between two partners to tell them how they ought to feel ( or how their partner must feel ) should be ashamed. But good luck on finding a professional who will tell you that.

Dante