sure I looked up the fishes. But I don't even get that. Is it a reference to Suetonius' training boys to swim as fish with him? I don't know how that ties to the rest of your post at all or even to the Hillary article.

I don't get anything here. I miss everyone's points and I am constantly being corrected. I'm used to it so it doesn't drive me away. It's the same in my so-called 'regular social life'. I don't understand any of this world or anything that is said, done, or written in it. Life is just to die as far as I know.

I should be more like Suetonius. That's where my evil heart lives. I'm a phony, a ghost wandering in search of something I can hang my hat on. Some reason why I continue to try to be a good person.

It's always been that way. At this point late in life, I figure it will always be that way. I'm amazed at how a person can live an entire life and not learn a damn thing, an ignorant blob of atoms, buzzing for no apparent reason.

I only stick around in the off chance that a little girl might smile at me as I pass in my travels. Only in the few times that has happened do I forget all this shit and heaven becomes mine.