Just read this, sounds like a lot's been happening since we last spoke on VoA. The only thing that struck me from your list of things to say on the phone was that you should ask that he ask her about her feelings, listen to what she has to say and trust her judgement and her feelings - its all about her, not him.

I really hope things go OK for you and her. As someone else said, you really are a bit of trail blazer you know.