You've been going beyond the usual lengths to repair relations, which tells me cynicism here is not necessarily trashing the attraction.

I, too, experience the inferiority/superiority issue you mention. It might be why I sometimes find myself in unexpected shitstorms here. I don't feel superior to others, but when they put me down for moments of exuberance, I tend to fight back hard. It's probably a trait that won't go away.

Stay honest. All I'd ever request of anyone.