DISCLAIMER: This post will likely offend many regular posters to this board, and may possibly get my GC access revoked. However, this has been a pressing issue for me, and it could be of interest to one or two others at GC. So, read this at my impending peril.


Two weeks ago I securely erased all images, saved pages, and videos of all LGs younger than 16 years-old from my all of my computers. All told, I removed over 1TB of data (750GB of it non-duplicated). These were all publicly accessible images, largely from Instagram, YouTube, Pinterest, and girls’ apparel catalog sites; so to the best of my knowledge no laws were broken downloading or collecting them.

Since, for me, regularly viewing such images only reinforces unhealthy personal habits, I wanted to get rid of any overt fap fodder. I've also stopped accessing similar images and videos online. This was a harsh choice, but I am glad that I made it.
[BTW, this is the seventh time in the last 12 years that I've tried to escape the corrosive influence of such material.]

I’m not in any way denying my MAP nature. I know that I will always be a GLer. However, I also want to be able to enjoy healthy non-sexually charged interactions with LGs as much as possible.

I’d hoped that this action would accomplish the following objectives:

• I would no longer become aroused in response to alluring displays of LGs legs or asses
  
• I would no longer subvert the innocent allure of LGs for my selfish sexual pleasure
  
• I would no longer prey upon attractive LGs by discreetly pursuing them through stores or strategically positioning myself to discreetly observe them in public
  
• I would no longer tend to objectify LGs as hot sexy fodder for my bedtime sexual fantasies
  
• I would start to normally perceive LGs as whole vibrant dynamic beings worthy of awe, respect, and non-sexual thoughts

Unfortunately, as Murphy would have it, my resolve was cruelly and immediately tested.

I’d recently signed up for a fitness boot camp which, as I discovered, primarily attracted 20-, 30-, and 40-something women. It turns out that I was the only male joining this particular class.

On my second day of boot camp, one of the younger women brought her 9yo niece with her. OMFG! This girl was a drop-dead babe! Not only did she have the tight, gently muscled body that I prefer in LGs, but her beautiful face alone made my loins tingle. It took all of my concentration not to entertain obscenely graphic fantasies about her. To my credit, although sorely tempted, neither did I do so once I returned home.

However, this gorgeous LG continued to attend subsequent sessions. I knew that it was only a matter to time before I would be provoked to despoil her innocence (figuratively speaking). Fortunately, the strict militaristic style of the young 20-ish boot camp coach drove me to join another class entirely.

However, this may be a case of leaping from the frying pan into the fire.

It turns out that my new coach’s achingly gorgeous 14yo daughter also attends the new boot camp. It was just my luck to be paired with this young beauty on my very first day. This girl was so sweet, friendly, and open that I prayed to God to not become visibly aroused. Only barely was I able to control myself. That was two days ago.

Then came yesterday.

There is this one little 7yo cutie at the liberal-leaning church I recently started attending who consistently runs around joyfully displaying her pretty bare legs in tiny shorts and thigh-baring dresses. Although she is skinnier than the LGs who typically excite me, her pretty face, vivacious personality, and lovely legs never fail to thoroughly slay me.

Sunday, she was particularly alluring in a pink top, tiny blue shorts, and strappy white sandals. I made sure to observe her closely for the entire 25 minutes that she was in the company of the adult congregation.

Last night I was on the razor’s edge of violently despoiling her innocence, but I valiantly managed to resist. Instead, I created another more age-appropriate fantasy with which to resolve my tension.

To be honest, I’m not sure how long I will be able to resist the temptation to relapse. Perhaps, this is but a useless exercise in futility. However, for my peace of mind, I have to try.