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My dog

Posted by Gimwinkle on Monday, January 20 2020 at 05:34:56AM

What Not To Name Your Dog


Everybody who has a dog calls him “rover” or “boy.”

I call mine "Sex." Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to city hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk that I would like to have a license for "Sex." He said, “I would like to have one too.”

Then I said, "You don't understand, I’ve had Sex since I was nine years old."

He said, "You must have been quite a kid.”

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex.

He said, "Every room in the place is for sex.”

I said, "You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night.”

The clerk said, "Me too.”

One day, I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I was planning to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets.

“But you don't understand.” I said, “I had hoped to have Sex on TV.” He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog.

I said, "Your honor, I had Sex before I was married.”

He said, "Me too.”

Then I told him that after I was married Sex left me.

He said, "Me too.”

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, “What are you doing in the alley at 4 o’clock in the morning?”

I said, “I’m looking for Sex.”

My case comes up Friday.






Gimwinkle





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