Another little tip from your Mr. grabby hands uncle Eeyore...

Start buying up everything that is classic Americana. The definition is too broad to explain, but then I am only speaking to those who know exactly what I mean by instinct or by years lived. If it's well-made, well-known, nostalgic, and simultaneously offensive to the Woke brigade? Grab it! Immediately!

In addition, you're well served to buy up everything you can that has been cancelled, but ESPECIALLY anything that was previously popular or previously considered wholesome. Tuck these things away like future treasure, which will very likely buy you more than a little bit of comfort later, provided you're a "refined" pedo, of.. patience, who is.. willing to wait.. until the proper socially agreed upon %)_^)%#**^(^(^!!!!

ARGH! YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

FUCK!!

I mean just buy that shit and wait a few years until you see the demand and price go up!

I'm not talking fat white trash women and their beanie babies. I'm talking about anything from old key chains to historic unapologetically het-tro pinup girls, to old artisan watches or classical gas emission cars.

Not a joke. If you can afford to buy some stuff and put it away, you WILL come out on the plus side later. I wouldn't steer my girl loving brethren wrong.

*These economic assertions have not been verified by Baldur. Past performance of collectibles does not necessarily indicate future dividends. Collect at your own risk. And definitely offload anything Coca-Cola before it's too late.