No video of Shirley Temple arguing with passengers on a bus loaded with unemployed adult male anime fans why they should admire her body-type more than the unrealistic body types in animation?

No Brooke Shields from Blue Lagoon giving erroneous instructional advice to a kindergarten class on a tropical beach regarding how babies are made?

No Darla Hood from the Little Rascals in a 1930's showgirl outfit stating that Alfalfa is not so attractive to her, and that his behavior might lead him to a tragic end one of these days, with Taylor Swift sitting in the background applauding Darla?

I was expecting a nightmare of creativity. Oh, well.