GM and insights

The other day I went to a social gathering, where numerous girls between 1-17 were present. I hadn't been to any gathering with such a large number of people in a while, so I wondered how I'd react. I previously considered my AOA to be 7-13, haven't had time to re-assess. BTW I went to this gathering almost exlusively for purposes of enjoying the scenery.

One girl of about 11 caught my eyes immediately, and I was by far the most attracted to her.
Toddler girls in cute dresses were running around, regularly drawing my attention despite me otherwise not being attracted to them.
A 17yo girl with an ok dress had an aura of 'taken' around her, so I didn't pay much attention. I later heard her speculating who I was most attracted to, but she had it all wrong. A 15yo girl was there, she looked good and I was moderately attracted to her (every other guy there was swooning over her), but a bit less than a 7yo girl that I briefly talked to.
There was a girl there who looked 13, and by my (low) standards looked ugly, although I was drawn to look at her mostly flat chest. A few other random girls that I mostly was indifferent to.

I was dazing in the distance, and I saw a girl of about 2yo, with her long blonde hair blowing in the wind, and I had a 'nature moment' where I'm struck by the beauty of some random thing. Dazed like that for a few minutes, I realized that from the distance I was at, she looked alot like my cousin when she was young, what with her long blonde hair. I then realized, that 11yo girl also had long blonde hair, and her face looked conspicuously like my cousin's when she was that age.

For those who haven't read my intro at tkGL, you should know that a fine dress/skirt on a female of any age will draw my gaze. Also, I've recently admitted to myself how much (and how long) I've been in love with my cousin.

Anyways, I made the connection and thought back to the thing I read somewhere, that situational offendors use children as a substitute for something they can't have. It wasn't specifically worded to say "as a substitute for an adult." I wondered, am I attracted to young girls (or at least some of them) because I think of them as a substitute for my cousin? I then considered, certain physical characteristics which I'm attracted to could be present both in her and other girls, and it'd just be a coincidence: it's the common characteristics I'm attracted to, not the similarity itself. I still haven't made a conclusion regarding this, but it's probably a mixture of both. Furthermore, I heard somewhere that boys create their ideal of a perfect mate based on how they see their mother. Sounds like imprinting to me. Now what if the imprint were made on someone other than the mother? That might be able to explain my situation.

Also, since I started regularly reading this forum, I've become more at ease with my sexuality in general, and am now more open to homoeroticism. I'm less aroused by adult porn than I used to be, but am more... compassionate I think the word is, towards others, especially children either male or female. Thank you GC! *blows kiss*