I know your pain 100%

The problem is, that doesn't make it any easier to completely accept. I can't be one of those people who embraces their pedoness 100% with no guilt whatsoever, as much as I'd like to be. It just doesn't work for me. And the desire to change isn't about believing pedosexuality is wrong--rather, it's about 1) not being judged by the greater masses and labelled sick and evil, and 2) having a "normal" life with a wife, 2.5 kids and the whole bit. In essence, both of those are the wrong reasons to not want to be a ped.

Amen guy, I read the whole thing and you must know you are not alone in your sorrows. I myself have come out, not to all society but close enough, to the relation of a LG I fell in love with. I myself feel exactly as you do because my heart and my mind are at absolute odds and I also do not see someone I can share prolonged and meaningful physical contact with.

Yes, while it is lovely to know one is not alone in ones troubles, it is no replacement for the flesh and blood companion that every human deserves and needs to survive.