You obv. have a drug deficiency. :p

For starters...

Don't worry--I won't be giving you one of those speeches about denying your sexuality and finding a "cure" for what obviously isn't a disease.

Good. It was very annoying, last time.

Now, where were we...

The last few days have brought me to that point yet again, once more casting me into a shadowy pool of self-doubt, guilt and sorrow.

Ah, yes! You obviously have a drug deficiency!

How do I know this? Well - people without a drug deficiency usually don't experience sorrow. They have preferences, naturally, things like "I'd strongly prefer my loved ones remain alive" - but the critical breakdown of coping ability just doesn't occur.

...in your case, not only does it occur, but it has, with no environmental stressor. Seriously. Look around. See any cops? Good. Then there's no law. While we're at it, see any people? Good, then the voice of society - which was pretty mythologized to begin with - doesn't exist either.

...which means that it's all you, the voices between your ears (lol.. 'internal dialogue,' though if ya have some additional ones, tell 'em "hi" for me), and nothin' else - and this is what you decided to do with it. :p

I suppose since the problem isn't you, we should probably check your internal dialogue. You might wanna seriously consider that, since it's the only other thing around - maybe question a few assumptions here 'n there, like if this mythical image really exists or if we're all just running around wild in the streets deciding whether to pretend some image or if we'd rather just smoke pot in public when the cops aren't around...

...but I digress. Pot's not exactly the drug you're deficient in. I suggest some of the endogenous ones. Dopamine comes to mind. Maybe a little serotonin. You sound like you're a bit short on both... just what have you been eating, and what the hell are you doing with the neurotransmitters you've got?

~sigh~ Silly, silly boy. You list the effect like it's the cause, when it's all just a major drug deficiency. You are what you eat. Personally, I'm guessing that a fuckload of mixed protien and a multivitamin would do you wonders.

...from there...

... and 2) having a "normal" life with a wife, 2.5 kids and the whole bit.

heh.

Maybe if you're reeeeaaally nice, I'll give you the domestic partnership rundown. :p

...whether you have an additional 2.5 kids on the side, well... that's between you and your wife, I'd imagine.

:p

Cheers.