Re: GM

Hi djcide,

You won't get into trouble for saying how you feel in this case.

I used to say "I love you" to my most special little-girl friend all the time, and hug her like anything, whether in front of her mother or not. You could have complimented that girl without any problem. Really. When these things are said in the open, most parents are either just proud, or see it as completely harmless, which is what it is. They will be happy that you are caring and get on so well with their children. If their girl wants to give you a hug and won't let you go, they'll just think it is cute and touching. It's only if you think there is a problem that it will become a problem, usually.

Yes, there is all sorts of irrational fear about men who love little children, but it doesn't really apply to you. In the eyes of the childrens' parents, you are probably (mainly) just a wonderful person who takes an interest in their children and makes them happy, and if nothing else, keeps them out of their parents' hair for a while. Just going on what you have written.

As long as you truly believe in yourself and the things you do then just tell the truth about how you feel. Of course you can go over the top on things, and you have a responsibility to be sensible, and not overbearing.

If I was in your position I would just wait until you are all sitting down together and say, "There is something I want to say. I love you all, and when I go away soon I am going to be very sad and miss all of you. But I'll be looking forward to when I come back, and I hope you will look after each other and have fun while I am away! I will be thinking of you all." It might be a good time for a group hug. I don't know how close you are but you might want to try and do something a bit special. If you let them know the week before, some of them will probably make you going-away cards. But then again you're only away for what, 2 months? So maybe it's not such a big deal really.

How you say these things just depends on how you are and the nature of your relationship with the group. But nobody is going to get upset about you saying something like that. Especially in a church where you are all almost on big-family terms anyway. I am sure it would cause no trouble whatsoever if you found your special M with her parents and just told them what a lovely daughter they have, and complimented her or maybe even told her you love her and will miss her while you are away right in front of them.

If you don't really know the parents at all, then it might be a bit awkward. But you'd be surprised how friendly people can be if you are just straight-forward and nice to them. Complimenting their children is a sure way to make parents happy!

Well, that's my thinking anyway, bearing in mind I don't know much about your situation.

Good luck!