Agreed.

What it sounds like, to me, is that her parents, probably particularly her father, caught her masturbating early on, physically punished her (probably in ways that made her genitalia hurt at the time - hence her resistance), and through this, instilled in her such a fear of sexuality and of being caught that it has remained. However, she didn't stop masturbating, but it now made her feel extremely guilty. Towards herself.

Fast forward, she gets a therapist, therapist hears sexual dysfunction issues, and the book says that's child sexual abuse. She can't remember it, but it takes the guilt away from masturbating, as a child or now, and absolves her of responsibility for any subsequent failures in relationships that her sexual dysfunction has caused.

That also explains her father's initial reaction now: to post snide comments on her FB wall. If he really had sexually abused her, that would be enough to put him behind bars these days. Abusers cannot brag about it. But he wasn't bragging about having abused her; he was bragging about the punishment he inflicted her when he caught her - and putting all the blame back at her for not learning off it.

That also explains her family's attitudes always and dismissal now. She was the one masturbating, and they were the ones trying to punish her for it but remaining, ultimately, unsuccessful. They saw her, therefore, as the whoreish one, and themselves as white knights trying to rescue her. Failing as a toddler despite punishment; failing as a child despite open signals of disgust; failing as an adult, as proven by the rape attempts. They collectively see her accusations against them, of active abuse by her father and complicity by her mother, as her way to blame them for her failures, a "you made me like this" (which in a way it is, but far from the way they mean it).

I don't think she was, ever, sexually abused by her father. I find her allegation that "it stopped when [she] put up resistance" nearly preposterous, as an adult (a) can still physically dominate a child much after 3yo, and for that matter a man can often physically dominate a woman if both are adults and (b) it still don't make sense that she would resist to something she had no way of knowing was "wrong" or "not normal". I do think she was physically abused by her father for masturbating at least once (whence "I taught you about sex when you were 3"); and psychologically abused for it then, and later on always. This made her forever uncomfortable with her own sexuality, and adulthood hasn't changed it (and why would it?). Blaming her family now is attractive because it deflects the responsibility for what she knows are sexual problems, towards others, but I doubt it will help her in the long term either.

Ironically, yes, her family are to blame for her sexual issues - but not in the way she thinks. Ironically, what her family did to her not only made her worse off, but now has come to bite them. They are innocent of sexual abuse, but they are guilty of creating the woman who needs a sexual abuse narrative focused on them for her own comfort. Can't really say I regret their ultimate fate.