Don't hate yourself totally! Hate what you did. Hate your actions. Find a way to correct that action so you can be forgiven by yourself or by Rainbow. Hating just yourself can lead to many bad moments and you will lose confidence that way. I used to hate myself for my decisions, but it was sending me to a big hole. I instead, started to hate my actions. I looked for way to destroy them by making it up to the person I wronged, and things worked out. Not overnight or instant to be sure, but it did repair some of the damage. So please don't hate yourself trillion.. hate your decision, or action.