I suspect that a lot of folks with an axe to grind have created a complex rationale for something which is, at its core, very simple.

Most folks are "naturally" hypocritical.

We eventually become civilized ( pick a culture.... any culture ) and choose to recognize standards that might be universal. But we are born wanting to take before we want to give.

.......

Ergo, human relationships are filled with conundrums which are only an issue when we try to resolve a dilemma which is both understandable AND hypocritical.

In a magical world we would attract only those we are attracted to. In the real world, we both receive unwanted interest and also fail to gain the eye of those we are attracted to.

The "creepy old man" is simply the result of the attractive girl's allure caching unwanted "fish" in the net.

Its not her fault. Is she supposed to hide beneath a burqua? Accept every suitor who indicates an interest?

Its as natural as sexual selection to broadcast one's charms in hopes of catching the attention of the ones we desire; even if we are lousy at letting down those we hoped might ignore us.

The "creepy" part is largely misplaced frustration at the way the tools of attraction fail to weed out everyone but the ones we want.

If we weren't hypocrites, we would be more sympathetic to those we don't care for out of respect for our own unrequited loves.

....................

And on a similar note...

There's similar natural hypocrisy going on in questions of fidelity.

At our core, we all want our loves to be exclusively devoted to us, and yet want the freedom for ourselves to pursue the sweet young thing we just met.

I've hung around with enough polyamorous pagans to see how the other solution works out.

And IMHO, denying jealousy works even moar poorly than denying the urge to wander.

Again, either way hypocritical urges are thwarted.

At the very least we could try to stick to a standard ourselves and be sympathetic to others who fail to live up to unreasonable demands on human nature.

But the worst of all is denying that nature is a hypocrite and blaming those who loved freely in ignorance of an unwritten agreement to settle the hidden dilemma.

Our hate should be reserved for those who hijack natural frustration to use it as a bludgeon on others.

Dante