No, I'm not.

Hi Infinity,

Actually, what I have provided is a pragmatic approach. Machiavelli wrote The Prince as a pragmatic guide to being a dictator if you are so inclined to do so. My post was meant as a pragmatic guide to having an affair if you are so inclined to do so.

I have made the assumption that he loves his wife and wants his marriage to work out, since he has said as much in his post. Actually, the first question I say he should ask himself is if he is willing to lie and deceive his wife. If he loves his wife, as he says he does, he may be unwilling or unable to do so. I said only if he is able to accept this should he continue with the process I laid out.

I am fully aware that women have feelings like we all do. I am also aware that many relationships are 'missing' something, and that people ought to try and solve what problems they have. I am answering the question he asked: something has already happened, people may have seen it, I still love my wife, but also have feelings for the girl, what do I do? If he had said he was considering something I would have answered differently.

I do not think my advice at the end was horribly irresponsible at all. If I had only recommended he learn to lie effectively it would have been irresponsible. What I actually said is that if, after evaluating all of the risks (losing his marriage, being found out, having mixed emotions, etc.) he still wants to go ahead with this affair, then he ought to learn how to lie effectively. I did not condone his extra-marital affair, I just said that if he is intent on having it, he needs to learn how to conceal it as well.