I am a lover of little girls. Society uses the word "pedophile" when referring to me. Technically, they are correct. But how they use it to make me appear evil has changed the meaning of the word. So, I am a lover of little girls.

Many years ago, I was involved with several little girls. One girl, I was illegally involved and, as my message below the following text will indicate, I paid the social price for it. But, there were two little girls that I was involved with but nothing illegal ever occurred. I wrote about these two several years ago and, today, I copy the post for those of you who are new here and want to know a bit about me. Text to follow:

Sometimes, They Know; Sometimes They Don’t.

One day, very long ago, I was living by myself (for various reasons) and living in a very poor neighborhood. At the time, I was just as poor. However, I was rich with knowledge and skills. I got a job soon and was no longer poor yet I stayed in the neighborhood. There were two extremely beautiful little girls who lived close by. A. and J. were sisters and A. ventured close, one weekend. I had just installed a (insanely huge) air conditioner in my little rental home because I hated the summer heat.

A. began playing in the nearby puddles making little dams and streams with the mud, all the while watching me finish up the installation. I went in and turned it on and, within a few short minutes, my windows were frosting due the rapidly dropping temperature inside. I actually came back outside on my porch to warm up a bit considering I had gotten it too cold inside. A. and I then met for the very first time. She just quietly walked over to me and looked at the fogging windows in Her curiosity.

"It's very cold in there now."

"Can I see?"

My heart slammed to a stop. She wore (I later learned) just a skimpy bit of underwear underneath a very grungy one-piece jumper and I was, as I call it, triggered. I wanted to hold Her with all my heart. But, so too, I knew I would probably ask something I should not. Nevertheless, there was this little 6 year old angel wanting to see the magic I had just created. In we went.

For months, the two sisters visited me afternoons after work and most of the time during the weekends. Their mother and I had met and began a (distant? light? friendly? not very friendly? I don't know what to call it) friendship. Because I was considered rich now, after realizing that I was not interested in her, one day when I was visiting their grungy home, the mother offered (in a very vague way) her 15 year old daughter (I can't remember her name). I (in a very vague way) declined. This puzzled the mother. Well, until 8 year old J. walked in looking for something. The mother and I were chatting idly but when J. walked in, I stumbled over ever word I tried to say. I tried to force my eyes back to the mother so as to not cause concern. When A. walked in to find Her sister, the mother knew my orientation right then and there. After that, the two girls would visit me any time I was home. I rarely visited the mother after that. Nor, did the mother mind. As long as I was taking very good care of her kids, she could get some of the fringe benefits, too.

One day, A. and J. were enjoying the ice cold front room at my place, watching some TV (something only I owned in the neighborhood.) A. and J. were casually arguing about desserts for supper during a dessert commercial on TV. J. wanted something from me but, from their argument, I knew what She wanted was not permitted by their mom. Of course, J. got angry and left, leaving A. to continue watching television. A. accidentally caught my attention although She didn't know why. Soon, She asked that, since J. had left, could She have some of what She was not permitted. It was impossible for me to refuse, so I retrieved a small portion of what She wanted. Then, this time intentionally capturing my attention, A. asked for more. And got it.

This was the beginning of a sort of abusive relationship on my part. If A. wanted anything. I mean, anything; she got it. And She knew how to get it. I should have stopped it, but I could not. And A. knew that, too. So, the symbiotic relationship ended up continuing for another month or so.

J., however, had never figured out how to control me. Eventually, this had frustrated Her. Because She was such a beautiful little girl, I had occasionally given in and rewarded Her just for being so pretty. But She could not control me. She knew that She couldn't and knew that A. could. Occasionally, She would figure a way to get A. to convince me to reward them both.

And, remember, A. was 6 while J. was 8. Both these girls knew the unusual power that they had as well as how to use it.

Finally, for the record, nothing illegal ever went on between the three of us. Nothing illegal. I know that seems to fly in the face of how A. could control me, but nonetheless, what She could do was not illegal.


Regarding this post and every post I write about myself describing my past, be advised that I was tried, convicted, sentenced to a very long time in prison, and I served the complete sentence. Be further advised that I am no longer practicing illegal activities today and that I refrain from doing so by my own choice, not from fear of legal entanglements or society's outrage. I remain crime free because I choose to.