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Do The Laws Work?... And venting.

Posted by LostKari on 2006-January-22 03:20:43 EST, Sunday
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The laws I mean are those about Age of Consent, the laws that prevent child/adult sexual relations (and can hinder good non-sexual child-adult relations).

I have no statistics and hard evidence I can point to, so don't take my word for it. But lets look at the information that is often passed around. Some of this is from the website http://www.prevent-abuse-now.com/stats.htm and some is just things I have heard many say.

Supposedly 1 in every 3 kids has been abused in one way or another. And that's real abuse, not one "small" occurence. Abuse is of course a lot more than just sexual. But sexual abuse would certainly fall into that, and the way people talk, you'd think 80% of the that stat is sexual abuse, when really, only 10%-15% is sex abuse. So if you think of that, then the laws are doing a pretty good job... But then what about the other 85%-90% of child abuse!? Anyone care to try stopping that?

And then of course there is the issue of what is called child sexual abuse. To be honest, it doesn't take much for it to "count". It's sad when it actually isn't abuse but the child is convinced over time that it was. Maybe the child agreed to it, wanted it, or even initiated it. And after the "abuse" is found out, the child is told over and over that this person she (he) loved was sick and twisted, used her, manipulated her, lied to her, abused her, took advantage of her... She gets it drilled into her that this person was a horrible criminal, and that if she doesn't agree with them, she's the one who must be sick and horrible. So there is two results. The child believes it was abuse, even when originally she wanted it. Or she doesn't believe it is abuse, but now believes she is confused, and bad. It's these cases that should not end up to be such a problem for the child, and yet they are hit on just as hard as out right rape.

To take a quote from the website I mentioned above...
"Young victims may not recognize their victimization as sexual abuse."
Either the victim simply doesn't know what is and isn't sexual abuse... or the victim didn't feel that what happened was abusive. Those who deal with such cases consider it their duty to make sure the kid realizes how wrong it was. And they say we manipulate children!?

I'm not saying, "Hurray for child sexual abuse." Absolutely not. What I'm saying is that there is this over powering blanket that encompasses all child-adult sexual relations, and it shouldn't. The people who push this kind of idea are giving children no credit at all, treating them like slaves and pets rather than human beings. It frustrates me that so many people are so hardlined about something that is actually so natural and healthy. Anyone who has looked into this or actually cares to keep an open mind will see the truth.

Let's make an example of what I mean. I know its obvious, but for anyone who still disagrees...

- A child asks an adult for a chocolate bar.
- The adult asks if the child is sure she wants it. Some people don't like that kind of chocolate bar and might think she's weird for wanting it.
- The child says she wants it anyway. She gets it, shares some with the man, eats her half, and loves it.
- The adult who gave the chocolate bar is happy to see her happy. Because he/she had no secret evil alterior motive and had no intent to hurt the child at all.
- Then 2 days later, another adult finds out about it.
- This new adult tells the child how wrong it was that this person let her have the chocolate bar. It's wrong because so many people say how gross the chocolate bar is. That other adult should have never let her have it.
- The child argues that she liked it. That she wanted it.
- The adult interogates her, tells her over and over how wrong it was. That this other person tricked her, lied to her, hurt her, etc.

And all along it was about a girl wanting a candy bar, and a friendly adult wanting her to be happy... Should this little girl not be allowed to eat chocolate bars? Should it be illegal for her to have that particular chocolate bar because others didn't like it? Should the man be punished for letting her have that candy, even when she asked for it?...

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